There’s nothing dirty about dirty talk—it’s communication, turned on.
Dirty Talk Is Hot — And Yes, It Can Be Awkward
If you've ever panicked mid-makeout about what to say—or worse, said nothing at all—you’re not alone. According to Tessa Somberg’s guide, dirty talk isn’t about putting on a show; it’s about connection, play, and being present with your desires.
Whether you're feeling shy, giggly, or just totally lost on where to start, this blog will guide you through dirty talk that feels queer, affirming, and actually doable—even if you're not the “talker” type.
Why Dirty Talk Feels Awkward (Especially for Queer Folks)
Let’s be real: a lot of dirty talk scripts were written for straight people in straight porn. That’s why it can feel cringe or disconnected when you try to apply it to a sapphic bedroom.
The good news? You can create your own language.
You’re not auditioning for a soap opera—you’re expressing what turns you on, what feels good, and what you want more of.
Start Small: Dirty Talk as Queer Foreplay
If the words won’t come in the moment, start outside the bedroom:
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Send a flirty text:
“I can’t stop thinking about how you kissed me last night.”
“I want you under me, now.” -
Try phone foreplay:
Practice saying things aloud to yourself. It helps make your sexy voice feel natural. -
Reminisce to build tension:
“Remember when you pinned me to the bed?”
“I still think about that night on the kitchen counter.”
Sapphic Dirty Talk Starters
“I” Statements (Assertive, confident)
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“I want your hands everywhere.”
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“I love it when you take your time.”
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“I need you to look at me while you do that.”
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“I’m so wet for you right now.”
“You” Statements (Praise + sensual feedback)
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“You feel so good inside me.”
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“You know exactly how to touch me.”
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“You’re so sexy when you take control.”
Commands (Powerful, dominant energy)
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“Take your clothes off. Slowly.”
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“Stay right there.”
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“Touch yourself for me.”
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“Don’t stop. I said don’t stop.”
Mix tone + timing with eye contact, whispers, or breathy pauses—make it yours.
Tips for Keeping It Queer, Not Scripted
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Make it specific:
Don’t copy porn lines. Talk about your body, your fantasies. -
Know your boundaries:
Check in on what words are off-limits—some femmes love being called “sl*t,” others don’t. -
Get playful:
Dirty talk isn’t a performance—it’s sexy improv. Laugh if needed. -
Use your senses:
What do you smell, taste, hear, feel? Describe it. That’s dirty talk too.
Kinky Dirty Talk Ideas for Lesbians
If you're ready to dial it up:
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“Good girls get rewarded. Are you being good?”
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“Tell me exactly where you want my mouth.”
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“Should I stop or keep going? Hmm?”
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“I’m going to make you beg.”
Pair this with:
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A blindfold for power play
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A remote-controlled toy (like Duopeak) during teasing
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A gentle command game during a sapphic date night
Aftercare: Still Part of the Conversation
The sex talk doesn’t end when the toys do.
Check in after. Say:
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“How did that feel for you?”
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“I loved hearing you.”
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“Anything you want more or less of next time?”
Dirty talk builds emotional safety, too.
Final Thoughts: Talking Dirty = Talking Queer
Dirty talk isn’t about performance—it's about presence. When you drop the pressure and speak from your desire, you're not just turning someone on—you're showing them they’re safe, wanted, and hot as hell.
So say what you want. Or whisper it. Or text it. Or moan it out between gasps.
That’s queer communication.
